Tips on how to procrastinate

Find yourself being too productive with your time?

Ending your days knowing you achieved your goals and full of satisfaction?

Want to change? Here are my tips for you!


1. Set some unrealistic and impossible goals

Nothing helps more deter a passionate and motivated person more then an impossible task. “Today I will write 20,000 words towards my book” or “Today I will run 30 km’s in the morning”

Better yet, keep your goals and objectives super general. Such as “I will become a great writer, or I will become fit”. That way, there being no clear definition of success, if you do nothing you will be just as successful as if you worked really hard at it!

Without a clear direction for your day/week/month/year you will be free to re-watch Buffy the Vampire slayer 17 times until you can memorise the script… progress!

2. Follow your urges, avoid schedules

You may be like me and usually wake up to an alarm, don’t let habits fool you, this is the first error for the truly procrastinate. Let your body tell you when to wake up. Don’t eat or even leave bed until your stomach craves your attention. Let yourself start doing work when it feels natural. After all, natural is always better right?

You may be tempted to plan out your day, another trap! Use of diaries and schedules are but a roadblock in your path to procrastination.

3. A body in flux is a body willing to complete tasks

Stay still and try to move around as little as possible. Put your fridge/tv/internet devices as close as possible to your bedroom. Avoid the outside world, sunlight may tempt you to get moving and start achieving. Let atrophy be your philosophy.

4. Finally ask yourself, what would a nihilist do?

If these strategies don’t work, this one is the key to avoidance of all tasks. Remember that in an infinitely expanding universe your finite problems are nothing. Whether or not you finish your essay, clean your house, write a book, lose 15 kilo’s doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things


Did these tips help you? Let me know in the comments!


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